coconuts.

Just a post for me to ramble because I like rambling.. nothing significant said here so you may as well stop reading (who actually says anything important.. if it's important you're much too serious, stop)... hanywho.. my mother has been on on a coconut binge lately (being a coconut herself) so there's been plenty of servings bouncing around, I even took some to work thinking I could share with my colleagues.. "nek minnit".. two of my colleagues hadn't even tasted coconut before (which was obviously force fed to them), one hadn't even had mango before OR apricots - super strange. Poor children, the deprivation of such basic joys one should have in life... I mean, where have these people been? the desert?? am I strange to find it strange? I likened it to not having ever seen The Sound of Music or Grease and you know what? Silence greeted me, my friends. silence.

what.

And I thought I was uncultured...

a moment of...

The awkward moment when you only learn someone's name when they add you on Facebook - and you've "known" them for years.

And maybe if I sit here sniffing this permanent marker a little longer I'll wake up.

Just rambling..

I've been having this incessant niggling at the back of my mind, well, not really at the back, it pretty much dominates me, about getting out of the 'office' sphere. It has never been my cup of tea, everyone knows it, but... it pays the bills right? So for now I'll just have to stop sooking... but I was thinking right, why not do like a short/part-time course? Get a taste of what I would maybe like to study in a couple of years time when my mother forces me to uni.. you know?

So I was having a little geeze at work during my paid hours, being all company productive as I always am, and there were quite a few courses that interested me.... trouble is though, none of them are actually useful :P

Which is slightly annoying (how will I ever make a living?!), but more amusing. Rather than trying something sensible like business (zzzzzzz...) or teaching training, I'm seriously considering codswollop like:

• astrology
• iridology
• reiki
• meditation and practical zen
• shiatsu
• breast fitness

                                                     You get the gist...

but I need to do SOMETHING.

or I will go insane.

Waste not, want not.

Defs some interesting characters at this place - there's one fellow (happy/spaced out/walks-on-his-toes sort of fellow), for instance, who has an incessant need to print something out every half hour or so, walk into someone else's office to use their stapler and then take it straight to the recycle bin.

Why? no idea.

We're keeping a tally of how many times he does this per day in addition to how many times he walks past... we've placed bets amongst ourselves... unethical but amusing.

Yesterday someone jammed a large bit of cardboard in the recycle slot to mess with his head... I watched him proceed to force his bit of paper in.. poor guy, it really frustrated him... we giggled in the adjacent office... he gave up and left it sitting on top of the bin.



On another note, this workplace can't seem to get my name.. I started with Heidi and have somehow ended up with Mackenzie....

The perfection of a tulip*

Third day into my new job and I don't quite know what to make of it just yet... the people are lovely, some eccentric, one possibly bi-polaric... and of course there's an office nerd, a Jew, a chick in slacks and pink chucks, the "with its".... diverse indeed.

and work flow? slow at the moment... but that's boring, who wants to read about that. I do need to personalise my desk though, its looking as interesting as a brick wall on a gloomy day.

Boring. Need a day like the one pictured below:

Feeling the need to do something crazy very soon.

*Please note: the title of this blog entry has no relevance whatsoever with the actual blog entry.

Letters to nobody.

Dear 12-yr girl with your butt cheeks literally hanging out of your short shorts,

1. Has your mother seen what you're wearing?

2. Don't you have some books to colour or something?

Sincerely,

Me

Dear boss of 4 more weeks,

You're not making it hard for me to leave you.

Sincerely,

Me

Dear Imogen Heap,

I'm seeing you tonight. You won't disappoint me and I will most likely tear up again (like the loser I am) because of your brilliancy.

Sincerely,

Me

Dear "the office racist",

Be careful, the black boy is behind you.

Sincerely,

Me

Literally sitting here twiddling my thumbs because I actually have no work to do. Like, none... nothing worth bothering to do anyway.

I can hear my boss smashing the phone and swearing in one of the conference rooms because he's a twit and doesn't know how to put it on speaker phone.

Lol. It's always  the "intelligent" one's who have no common sense.

I'm gonna go..... shave...

Blah.

It wasn't even midday yet and already 3 calls from work. Like, do you mind?! trying to be ill here.

That is all.

Silver lining?

So I slammed the phone down on my boss the other day after 2.5 years of being trampled on and since then he's either:

a) avoiding me
b) giving me silent treatment
or c) a bit of both

Which ever it is, it's suiting me just fine.

I don't know whether I should be a little worried though, I know him, and I know he can be quite calculating. But I also know what the firm is without me - stressed and messed up.

What ever happens though, it's time for a new environment anyway :)

Just here to vent.

OF ALL THE ARROGANT, PRETENTIOUS, COLD-HEARTED GITS!! PLUS at least ten additional profane and obscene adjectives!

He's a downright Scrooge! If he thinks I will be working on Christmas Eve whilst he is off holidaying overseas he can think again.

Christmas Eve for crying out loud!

I'm going to write a letter!

I have a rather large suitcase sitting on my bed begging to be filled (never mind the 23kg limit as my baggage allowance) but the one thing I need the most is nowhere to be found - where is my motivation? I have been looking forward to this trip for months! I wake up hours before my alarm is due to go off I'm that excited. Allegedly.

I blame He Who Must Not Be Named (my boss - I'd type his name but I know for a fact he Google's himself on a weekly basis).

DRAINER.