Yes we do love our Asain photo booths, we do.

Anna and I having our much needed girl date :)

                                          

Unknown

"Feeling is the nominalization of "to feel". "

Well thanks for nothing Wikipedia.

Don't you wish sometimes that you could Google someone's feelings? Or even Google an explanation of your own feelings? It would be so easy. No attachments, no misinterpretations, no mind games, not having to "read between the lines"... facts. This is my call to science, stop avoiding it, help a sister out. Technologise the human out of that. Google needs to know e.v.e.r.y.t.h.i.n.g.

*Feelings are bothersome*

Word to the wise.

Whatever you do, don't trust anyone else's sense of aesthetics.

Poor me.

Went to QLD on the weekend for my cousin's wedding (who I hadn't seen for 17 years) and so given the occasion I decided I was going to get my make-up done professionally - I wanted to make a good impression ok?? (see what I did there?).
So anyway, I pre-booked a salon right, got to Brisbane, met my beautician (told her my dress was cream and told her I was going for the natural look with emphasis on the eyes - she seemed all for it), got taken out to the beauty rooms, seated, head back, eyes closed, all seemed well.

We talked. She painted. I liked her. She finished.

Look, I don't like to judge but it seemed to me after what I was shown as a finished product, that she was off her rocker, or maybe there's some new age definition of "natural", or maybe she was just having me on and was going to fix it before letting me out in public.. but she didn't.

I didn't take a picture, I thought about it but I decided I didn't want any one to see me like that.. not even for laughs..so you'll have to use your imagination.

I looked like an A-grade transvestite. My foundation was caked on, she'd used gold eyeshadow near my brow bone and under my eyes with dark brown eyeshadow on the lid and crease, flicking the corners up towards my eyebrow (you know, reserved for the vampire look), no eyeliner, the tiniest amount of mascara. My cheekbones were sharply "highlighted" with an earthy red blush. As she was doing my lips she was telling me she would put a stain on under the lipstick so that when I ate I would still have a bit of colour and wouldn't look too pale - I was expecting a soft pink or something. It almost looked black.

I almost gagged at the sight of myself. I couldn't believe she was for real.

I couldn't complain cos I liked her and I'd feel bad but it was so NOT what I was after. I barely managed an eyebrow raise and a "cool". Apparently she loved it.

Paid $65 for that only to wipe it off and go straight to the chemist for supplies to fix it.

Disaster. Never again.

Whatta mad dog.

I went to my sister's house tonight for dinner, and my brother-in-law Bryce took me for a spin on his motorbike. That's right guys, his big, black, sexy Harley Davidson. And for a moment, I felt like a legit bikie chick in a harley leather jacket, face mask, helmet, glasses and leather gloves. If we could just take a moment now to picture this and appreciate the moment I had please?

It was sooooo... exhilarating, amazing, exciting, thrilling, adrenalating etc etc.. It was like, one moment we're going around round abouts and i'm scared that if we lean just a little bit more we could fall off, and the next moment we're gearing up hills or racing down the freeway, my eyes watering against the wind that has pushed past my eye wear, and then the next moment my butt is banging against the seat as we ride down a bumpy rode at 110kms.

And the inertia? amazing.

Yep. I'm pretty much gonna get me one of them.

Women of class

Late last year it was my beautiful sister Leilani's 33rd birthday and what better way to celebrate 33 years of being a live fem than to flaunt it. In the most nutty way possible. So she themed her birthday "Mad Hatter's Tea Party" with an invite that went something like this:

MAD HATTERS TEA PARTY

YOU ARE ALL INVITED TO ATTEND A VERY UNEVEN BIRTHDAY!! SO BRING YOUR BEST TEA CUP AND FILL IT WITH PUNCH! IT'S A VERY IMPORTANT DATE SO DON'T BE LATE AND WE'LL ENJOY SOME MADNESS & FUN...BUT BEWARE ITS DRESS UP AND IF YOU'RE ABSENT MINDED AND FORGET YOUR ATTIRE IT WILL BE OFF WITH YOUR HEAD OR OUT THE DOOR!!


Dress Up Theme: Sexy, Psycho, Mad mother effkin Biartches!! Dress Up attendees only - Ladies of their loins
Mood: Crazy.
Intention: Fun!!
Invited: Girls only. Alcoholics. Those ready to PARTAY only!! Private party. No males, child free!!
What to bring: your sexy ass, a tea cup and sleeping gear if you're joining the slumber party after..


So naturally, as you can imagine, things went down. Let's just say being the only sober person there was high-larious.
So in the country (Gisbourne to be precise), with ladies of their loins, intoxication round about and fem bogans, these are a snippets of the night...

Birthday girl (she has her motorbike license. what a mad dog.)

                                                             

Aunty Wendy

all my sisters :)

And I'll just stop there.

They get far too raunchy.